Children and Grief
Experts agree that children, even very young ones, should not be shielded from a death in the family. Talk with them simply and truthfully, in a way that fits their age.
Talking With Children
Ask what the child already knows, then explain simply and honestly, for example: "Grandma's heart got too tired and stopped working, so she died."
Avoid phrases like "went to sleep," which a child may take literally. Let them ask questions, and do not press them if they are quiet.
Ages 2 to 7
Young children often see death as a separation and may feel scared or not want to be alone.
Because they may not have words for their feelings yet, they may act out or have trouble with eating or sleeping.
Ages 7 to 12 and Teens
Children from 7 to 12 begin to understand that death is permanent. Some worry about their own safety, and others withdraw.
Teens understand death much as adults do but may express grief through risky behavior. If you are worried that a child may be in danger, seek professional counseling right away.